This will lead him to disrespect other women as well. This can be due to several factors, including his mothers personality, her own relationship with her mother, and their family history. He sees how you react to situations and learns from your example. A mother may wonder how her son could hate her after she gave birth to him. A son who treats his mother poorly might feel too restricted or micromanaged, or hes going through some issues. Now there are always exceptions; but remember, theyre called exceptions for a reason, and not the rule. He doesnt talk about his mother with others in his relationships. A mother must show her son that she loves him without being too much. Control is the issue at the heart of this conflict. And no one thing always means sons will love or hate their mothers. They respond poorly to critique and have a high need for excessive praise. Why are some sons so mean to their mothers? In this kind of relationship, both the mother and son are constantly trying to get something from each other. If your son has experienced any kind of childhood trauma, it can lead to emotional and behavioral issues that will often be taken out on you. If a mother is treated poorly by her son, its essential to understand that it is not always the mothers fault. She wants to feel loved and appreciated, and if she cannot find this in her husband or other male figures around her, she will seek it out from her son. They want to be perfect in their eyes. Your email address will not be published. This can be clearly seen in the actions of males in particular. Showing little or no respect for her boundaries, opinions, and feelings. 6. Some sons may behave poorly towards their mothers because they feel unappreciated or taken for granted. If they are attracted to the opposite sex, that is, daughters like fathers, while sons like their mothers, that's positive Phallic psychosexual development, and this could help us explain why sons are closer to their mothers. Body Scan Meditation Script (Plus Tips to Improve Your Meditation), Metta Meditation Script (A Powerful Buddhist Meditation), My Husband Hides My Belongings! It may not seem a stretch to imagine a son hating a mean, harmful mother, but some sons truly hate their mothers, despite the moms being utterly caring and loving. The relationship between a mother and her son is complicated. His mother tries to triangulate by going through the spouse to get what she wants from the son. If you are not sure that you are on the same page, ask your son to explain what he thinks you want and then tell him what you really want. This was illustrated in a 2015 British study, Hidden Voices, which surveyed nearly 2,000 individuals about why they were estranged from their parents and the psychological consequences of the estrangements. While a person is not at fault for their own mental illness or personality disorders, they can become burdensome on relationships, causing irrevocable damage. Whether youre a mother, a son, or just a person with a beating heart and an internet connection, this information should make you feel less alone. This final act of estrangement is a characteristic of sons who hate their mothers. The overly controlling mother This form of parenting is seen quite often in mother-daughter relationships. Little Ninja parenting is compensated for referring traffic and business to these companies. When your mother treats you like a child and tries to control every aspect of your life, its a sign that shes abusing her role as a parent. It's normal for adult sons to have conflicts with their mothers. The dysfunction of the mother-son relationship will always affect his other relationships, in either big or small ways, whether the son likes or not. Its difficult to say why some sons are mean to their mothers. Mothers Should Not Judge Their Sons Too Much. Here are some reasons why this happens: When a mother is too hard on her son, he will begin to disrespect her. Whatever the reason, its also important to remember that the relationship between mother and son is very complex. If you think this is the reason your son is treating you badly, its important to take a step back and reassess how you interact with your son, and make sure youre not smothering him or overstepping boundaries. Some of the most illuminating writing on the mother-son relationships comes from William Pollack in his book Real Boys, where he describes how men are forced into a "gender straitjacket" and how mothers can reinforce these norms by encouraging them to suppress emotion. Check out our Have A Peaceful Home Without Yelling video course here. For example, issues such as in-laws, marriage, and even divorce were common reasons a son would find estrangement necessary. There should be a special bond between a mother and a son, in some cultures, it is revered and celebrated. With proper medical care, it is possible for sons and mothers to repair their relationship but this isnt guaranteed; and its especially difficult when adult sons with illness need to continue to live with their parents as a result. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-netboard-1','ezslot_20',114,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-netboard-1-0'); Sons who hate their mothers may get so tired of what they consider a toxic relationship that they simply abandon it altogether. Whatever the reason, its not healthy for either the mother or the son. However, this type of mother can also be overbearing. In this case, the mother has a soft heart, so she always forgives her son. Some mothers feel that they are always right, so there is no need to apologize. Mother-son relationships can be complicated, and the specifics of a dysfunctional one vary widely. Control is also evident when mothers make decisions for their children without consulting them first. So when mothers arent there for their sons anymore, when theyre finally letting their sons handle things on their own, it can seem like they are trying to take over their sons life again by telling them what not to do or criticizing their choices. This will give your son a chance to have time to process what you have told him, and it will allow him some time to digest the information. In these situations, the son may be left feeling confused and angry. Related Heres how to set boundaries for your in-laws. Men will challenge a woman they date more than they would challenge their mom. Though traits of NPD may show up during childhood or late adolescence, most people with NPD are diagnosed in early adulthood. However, there are some commonalities we can zero in on that help us better understand the extreme reaction of hate from some sons towards their mothers. Many factors contribute to this strained relationship, and mothers should not take it upon themselves to shoulder all the blame. When a son mistreats his mother, it can be hard to know how to respond. Only then can you hope to have a healthy, supportive relationship with your mother. A mother who crosses boundaries will inevitably have a son who will grow up to cut off contact with her. This could be because the mother cheated on her husband or because she remarried and her new partner adopted or had another child. Here are a few tips for dealing with sons who treat their mothers poorly. He might feel like he doesnt know how to relate to women because the woman who raised him made him feel uncomfortable around her. The mother may be too critical of her son, making him feel she does not respect him. An academic study in the Journal of Family Psychology studied 1,500 adolescents to recognize the parenting differences African American mothers had with their sons and daughters. But what happens when a mother is mistreated by her son? However, if the mother favors one child over another or treats them differently, then this may indicate an unwell relationship between the two. Its important to remember that youre not alone in this. Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly - YouTube 0:00 / 1:10 Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly 433 views Feb 24, 2021 To see more info on this and many other parenting related topics .more. So as great as it is that women are encouraged to lean in and take the bull by the horns at. 6 Ways To Keep The Zen! Interactions with your mom can be a . if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-netboard-2','ezslot_21',115,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-netboard-2-0'); Narcissistic Personality Disorder: People with NPD are rude, self-centered, demanding, and feel superior to all others, including their parents. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-medrectangle-4','ezslot_1',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-medrectangle-4-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-medrectangle-4','ezslot_2',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-medrectangle-4-0_1');.medrectangle-4-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. But what happens when that relationship goes bad? Again, this will lead to resentment, negatively affecting their relationship. If a mother constantly judges her son then he might end up resenting her for it because he does not want people to talk about him like that. Little Ninja Parenting is supported by participation in affiliate programs. These sons also seem to portray a sense of avoidance when it comes to the nosy mother. But we all make mistakes, and its how you deal with them and try to fix them that matters. This can often lead to increased bad behavior, such as lying or stealing money from his parents wallets. If the children do not meet their expectations, they usually punish them with harsh words or even physical violence. Make sure he understands what you expect from him and that he respects those boundaries. Trey was a major mama's boy, whose mommy came over to take care of him when he had the flu, rubbing Vicks Vapor Rub on his chest, as Charlotte stood in the doorway horrified. The result can be a deep feeling of inadequacy and insecurity. It may also damage his relationships with other women. Treating her with disrespect or contempt. If possible, schedule the meeting in the evening or on a weekend. How To Survive Financially As A Single Mom: 13 Actionable Tips To Fewer Money Woes! As such, Ive approached this topic sincerely and am happy to share with you what Ive learned about this paradoxical issue. The people youre son (and anyone) chooses to hang around with have a huge impact on their lives, its something to take very seriously. This will also help him take responsibility for his actions instead of blaming others or playing the victim card when something goes wrong in his own life (which is often a defense mechanism). Usually this stems from misuse of parent-child roles; for example, if there is an absent or neglectful father, then the mother may rely on her son inappropriately for counsel and companionship. Here are some of the reasons behind sons who treat their mothers poorly and tips on how to tackle this issue: Young men can have a lot of emotional issues, its part of growing up and handling relationships, and dealing with experiences. The saying, Action speaks louder than words, is so true when it comes to being a parent and a role model. Mothers who do not get enough attention from their partners, have trouble finding fulfillment in their work, or struggle with depression are more likely to hurt their adult child in this way. No child should feel like she runs the household and that her parent or caretaker is there to serve her. She may start to question why she even bothered to have children in the first place and may even start to resent them. Even when theyre 20+, they might still be in a teenage stage where their focus is on themselves and they have a hard time understanding the needs of others. It could also give you some insight into whats going on in his life, which can help you be more supportive of him as he grows up. They are often seen as the epitome of a mother because they are very strict and do not hesitate to discipline their children. Sons who treat their mothers poorly aren't just hurting themselves. Step 1. The males who cut off contact with their mothers listed the following reasons for their estrangements:if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-narrow-sky-2','ezslot_19',158,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-narrow-sky-2-0'); From the parents side, having a better understanding of their sons point of view was a key factor. Make sure you show him how much you believe in him and what he can do, and dont forget to give him compliments when he succeeds at something. You want him to feel like he can talk to you about everything in his healthy adult life, including things like his friends and hobbies. The son might start to resent his mother and feel like he cant do anything without her permission. Here are six signs of an unhealthy mother-son relationship: 1. Disclaimer regarding normal parent-child roles: There is the exception of the changing child-parent relationship when the parent is aging and the child takes on a care-giver identity akin to parenting. The mother is the first person who can teach her son how to respect other people. He might feel like he doesnt know how to relate to women because the mother sons who treat their mothers poorly mistreated by her,. Words, is so true when it comes to being a parent and a role model, people! 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